today’s horoscope

(born btwn, Jan 1-Dec 31)

You’re charismatic and a little bit flashy today. You love gold, and who wouldn’t? You deserve gold. All gold everything. It is a power symbol that you demand. All of your friendships will be affected by your lust for gold. A job opportunity is on your horizon. But it won’t be enough to satisfy your gold cravings. The quest will drive you mad, and you’ll begin to insist everything you love is gold. Especially your breakfast. It starts with the pancakes, sure. But it quickly gets out of hand. You’re dipping strips of bacon into liquid gold. You employ shady tactics to cripple the businesses of any and all competitors in your campaign for a gold-dipped breakfast food industry. Your friends and family no longer recognize the person you’ve become. You go bankrupt. Nobody wants to eat literally golden pancakes like you do. Nobody. You are alone. And quickly running out of gold. Be sure to focus on the positive today.