You spilled ink on your page because there’s nothing more terrifying than a blank canvas. Bright-white burning deep into your retinas, reminding you that up to this point, you’ve failed. You’re no Jack Kerouac. There’s no hippy movement to talk about. You flip through your mental rolodex, pausing to wonder if people even know what a rolodex is anymore. You do. But you figure most people probably don’t. What should you write about… You start entertain the idea of a vlog. It’d be easier. At least then you wouldn’t have to actually put pen to paper. Or fingers to keys. You could talk about cycling, how you’ve always wondered if people don’t feel super silly with those spandex shorts and oblong-shaped helmets. You start to recall that funny gif you saw of the guy’s bike shorts getting caught in his bike chain. He took quite a spill. He cracked his head and what looked like orange caramel began to leak out. It was weird. Not funny, now that you really think about it. The internet is an odd place. You decide to write about that. Until memories come flooding back about the time you clicked on a link that you thought was for a heavy metal band, but ended up being digital art of a wedding in Australia. There was no cake, just wedding cookies and bad mens fashion. Tap, Tap, Tap. Your hand, gripping your pen tightly, helps to remind you that you still haven’t gotten anything done. You could always blog about Old Hollywood films. But then you’d be that guy… The pretentious film critic. Even you would hate you. You could write about aviation. Wait, how about agriculture? Alright. You kinda feel stupid even entertaining that idea. ARGGGGG. Writer’s block is the worst. You figure you have four options. 1. Play video games. Titanfall looks pretty good. 2. Watch that Orphan Black show people keep talking about. 3. Curl up in the fetal position and cry. 4. Go to Denny’s. Obviously you’re gonna choose Denny’s. Denny’s is where writer’s block goes to die a slow delicious death. Afterwards you’ll feel better. And you’ll finally be able to write your masterpiece. On second thought, after a meal from Denny’s, you’ll probably want to take a nap. Then you’ll get back to writing. You promise.